Have you ever went over to a friend's house to eat and the food just ain't no good? I mean, the macaroni's soggy, the peas are mushed, and the chicken tastes like wood...
This is why I always bring food with me when I'm invited somewhere... so I have something fabulous to eat! Then everyone is all like, "Ohhhhh jin! You are sooo sweet! You brought us pastries! How generous of you!"
No one ever suspects I'm really being a rude picky bitch.
I think you'll find the question of manners was answered in the classic Sugarhill Gang hit, "Rapper's Delight." The best rap ever about Keopectate and super sperm.
Pound your fists on the table, and scream, "This is a Travesty!!!"
When they ask, "What are you talking about?"
You say, "Here we are, a bunch of fat, overfed Americans enjoying this fine meal while thousands, if not more, of our fellow countrymen, and women are going hungry. I simply cannot eat another bite out of good conscience. I hope you will respect my decision."
16 comments:
Oh, so well played my friend. Kudos.
ha!
seriously, how good is th' friend??
I go to the Hotel Motel Holiday Inn and see what they have on the buffet.
Well that and Pepto-bismal.
Signed, Master Gee (hmmm I see status ideas before my eyes...)
In the end, your one true friend
has to come to your own defense
Who is your one
true friend?
Fran I think Ka-O-Pec-Tate is the remedy.
This is why I always bring food with me when I'm invited somewhere... so I have something fabulous to eat! Then everyone is all like, "Ohhhhh jin! You are sooo sweet! You brought us pastries! How generous of you!"
No one ever suspects I'm really being a rude picky bitch.
I think you'll find the question of manners was answered in the classic Sugarhill Gang hit, "Rapper's Delight." The best rap ever about Keopectate and super sperm.
I stop being friends with them.
How about a human being?
You have free will, so you can choose your friends as you wish.
Because all time will tell
is that everything is a lie.
I lost the fight
but won the war.
and no one really knows what it is we're fighting for.
Throw up on the table and then order in.
You try to play it off like you think you can by sayin' that you're full, obviously.
Nicely done.
Feign a sudden illness. Then you don't hurt their feelings.
secretly give it to the dog
Pound your fists on the table, and scream, "This is a Travesty!!!"
When they ask, "What are you talking about?"
You say, "Here we are, a bunch of fat, overfed Americans enjoying this fine meal while thousands, if not more, of our fellow countrymen, and women are going hungry. I simply cannot eat another bite out of good conscience. I hope you will respect my decision."
After that post, I'd be eternally afraid of asking you over for dinner.
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